THE PRECIPICE 2

P. 119-120

I keep being reminded that “you teach what you want to learn.” THANK YOU!

And so here I am again face to face with this paradoxical dilemma. I could say it is continually asking the question “Who am I,” but perhaps a more profitable question might be “Through what lens am I viewing myself and my world?” Even hear our language breaks down, but for a moment imagine that I am perceiving myself and my world, which includes you as well, that I am perceiving through the lens of my limited personality/egocentric self. And let us say we even drop other people and all the comings and goings of the outside world and focus very simply on my perception of myself through the lens of my personality.

I ask myself “What do I need? What do I want?,” and when I finally work through all of the desires, all of the ambitions, all of the things that I think will make me happy, I am left with the essential notion that what I desire more than anything else is to be at peace. And here is where the Paradox or the seeming contradiction becomes most relevant because what the ego or personality self seeks it cannot find. What I am being asked to do with that  limited part of me to hold it in love as I would a child and let myself know that God/Spirit/ my Divine consciousness knows what I do not or cannot know with I'm my mortal mind. My intellect is created to always question; the small self is created to continue to search. it is made to be restless it is made to be dissatisfied.

What we essentially realize, which has been taught in so many spiritual works is that we are attempting to address our spiritual needs through our mortal or material self. (The dalai lama pointed out that the most common misconception in the West is the attempt to fulfill our spiritual desires by material means) And here is the cusp about our deepest lesson that it is only through Spirit that we can find an embrace the longing of our hearts. Agustin expressed it this way, “Lord you have made our hearts restless and they will never rest until they rest in Thee. But what that means and what we often miss is that resting in God or in the Truth of our being means surrendering all of those thoughts and ideas and beliefs and patterns of behavior that we think are going to solve our problems.

You see, with the thinking mind/the ego/the personality self or whatever way we choose to describe it, whatever we get is never going to be enough. the paradox continues as we recognize with the Tibetan philosopher and mystic Chogyam Trungpa: “Enlightenment is the ego's ultimate disappointment.” The ego thinks it knows what it needs and what it wants in order to be at peace and yet as we said above whatever it gets is never enough. The Divine self or the Truth of Who You Are does not need or want anything. It is absolutely perfect and complete in it's knowing and in its connection to the Divine Source from which it flows.

 What I would encourage all of us to do, certainly myself included, is when questions arise from this book or from any aspect of our study of spirituality, that we sit with the question for a moment and ask ourselves, “Is this question or is this thought  that I am conemtplating at the moment, does it come from my limited personality consciousness or does it come from my Divine self?” There is no rule book for this one, but quite often the answer will come. If it is a question is flowing from my limited consciousness then I can begin to identify it more with a sense of fearfulness or separation or anxiety or the need to be right, and then what I am being asked to do is to embrace this neediness or this question and to hold it again as I would hold frightened child and to realize that my Divine self/ the God within knows the answer or the direction or the guidance or the nurturing in ways that my limited mind cannot comprehend. That what is in charge here is the essence of unconditional love.

Now that whole reflection brings us to another place in this work we are doing which centers in Awareness. it has been mentioned before that a very essential aspect of this journey on planet Earth will involve us moving from a state of unawareness to awareness and then falling back into forgetfulness and becoming aware again. We will do this until we do not need to do it any longer. Very similar to Peter asked Jesus how many times should I forgive my brother Jesus answered 70 x 7 which essentially is a mystical number that means you keep doing it unto you don't need to do it anymore.

Being awake or being aware or being asleep and being unaware is not a matter of judgment or something wrong with us. It is a learning, a continual learning. It was observed in class this morning that there are some people or situations in life that might tend to trigger that sense of separateness or limitation more so than others. it is good to be aware of that and in some cases it might mean that there are situations or individuals that for a while in life perhaps we might choose to avoid. Most often than not, however, that might not be possible. Here again is the possibility of some deep learning --instead of blaming the other person, perhaps being able to ask ourselves “What is it about my relationship or my perception of someone that keeps getting me hooked and what do I need to do with that one.” Again not judgment but awareness.

When we fall into unawareness that is what the book might refer to as being controlled or guided by our history. In other words we respond to a person place or situation without thinking. We respond unconsciously in robot mode. When we awaken however, when we become aware again, we now have another decision to make. I can beat myself up for falling asleep or I can rejoice in being awake and aware again.

Another way of perceiving this or holding it is it when I am unaware or asleep I am out of touch or out of alignment with the Divine truth of who I am it is that simple and that profound.

 “Now today we would like to teach you some things about your obligations, your adherence to forms, and those things that you think are so that may be so or may not be so. The alignment that you each have to date brings you to where you stand. There can be nothing in your reality, for better or for worse, that you cannot agree with. So, consequently, how do you choose what you call to you as your inheritance—your inheritance being your worth as expressed by you in all ways?

The decisions that you make that are born in form, that are born in agreement with history, continue to perpetuate what you have known. The willingness that you must each take now to go forward is to realize that when you walk toward the unknown, you must align to it as a place of infinite choice.”

We are reminded of what ACIM states: “When you bring the past it into the present, you create a future Jesuit like your past.” This is a profound description of being lead or controlled by our history. 

It might be important here to examine what I ma going to call somewhat of a missing piece here. 

My personality self is not a separate identity that lives inside me, it is simply a limited form of perception. WAe do not want the ego or the personality self to be the bad guy here because the personality or the ego self is also a creation of the Divine mind and is part of our chosen vehicle here on planet Earth. So it might be helpful every once in awhile to ask ourselves “What does my pride have to teach me? What does my sense of separateness have to teach me? What does my fear of this or that have to teach me?” With this understanding there is nothing outside of the realm of our learning. As we embrace that, we also learn lovingly that all is in divine order. Although my small self might rebelled against that, still another truth becomes revealed and that is that the ego the small self the personality also grows and evolves.

You will notice in yourself perhaps that your separate identity which is also another way of naming your personality or your ego has become more transparent over time, has become less fearful or less rebellious. It has become more aware that your spiritual search is not the enemy here either, that all can be approached lovingly even in its imperfection. 

The following are some quotes from the book The Holy Spirit’s Interpretation of the New Testament. My sense is that a major teaching of this work concerns itself with what we are calling “being awake/aware and being asleep/unconscious.

“Think of the world as a dream, for it seems real while you are here. But think of Heaven as awakening. Upon reaching Heaven, you will realize that the world, and all you thought there, was never true and so it mattered not.”

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“Do not feel guilty about your distractions, for distractions cause no loss in the Will of God. God’s Will is truth, and so it remains always true. Distractions can have no affect on it. Distractions only distract you from what is true, so that your focus is on distractions, which distract you from the awareness of truth.

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But then the awakened willingness within comes, and it calls you to turn away from distractions. It calls you to return your mind fully to the awareness of truth. In this calling, your distractions can serve the purpose of truth. For all things given to your willingness will be used by your willingness to further awaken the call within you. This will continue until your distractions are no more, and you are fully awake to the singular thought of God without distraction of any kind.”

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You, who are reading these words, are the sleeping Son of God. You are sleeping, because you believe in the world. And you are the Son of God, because you are the extension of the Light that is God.”

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“When you awaken to the truth and remembrance of reality, there shall be great rejoicing within Heaven. Not because you were lost, for you never were, but because you have found your Self again.”

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“When you find willingness, clasp hands with your Holy Spirit in joy! Walk forward in trust and willingness. This is your desire awakened, and it is leading you Home.

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This next one is so beautiful!!!!

“(v 6 – 9)1Let Me tell you what I see when I look at you. 2I see faith and willingness and love. 3I see a heart that is so strong, not even the heavens of your universe can contain it. 4I see a mind that is awakening to its own Heart. 5I see gentleness through awakening, and I am grateful to have come to welcome you back unto your truth.”

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“Listen to Me and what I teach you now. I am the holy Voice of Wisdom, and I teach your process for forgiveness:

As you think, you experience.

It is through your thinking that illusion is made.

It is through awareness of thought that you see what I teach.

It is through releasing thought that illusion is let go.

This is the process of awakening. As you let Me, I take your hand and lead you through this process now.Everything is according to your own willingness.

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Awakening comes from the Heart, so let the Heart lead in all things. The mind is the great receiver.But with the Heart, sort through that which is received. Let the Heart and mind together give to spirit, so that the deliverer receives, always, through the Heart. Let the Heart be the test of all that is delivered, and you shall deliver only from the Heart.”

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Let the awakened mind dance within your awareness, and the sleeping mind shall rouse itself within your hymns of joy. This is the miracle of awakening:

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Gratitude is the way, as is resting. Have gratitude for the state of awakening, and rest peacefully any murmurings of dreams. 3In this way, sleep may be finished, and awakening may joyously be received.

In Love, Grace, Gratitude and Peace